Building Healthy Relationships: With Yourself and Others

Peer reviewed by Dr. Peter Rawlek, MD & Scott Rollo, PhD

Healthy relationships are an important part of feeling good and confident as you grow up. They don’t just happen by chance—they take practice, understanding, and care. This includes not only your friendships and family connections but also how you treat and understand yourself. Learning how to communicate, respect boundaries, and handle disagreements can help you feel more connected and confident now and later in life.

What Does a Healthy Relationship Look Like?

Healthy relationships rest on three important parts:

• Respect: Caring about each other’s feelings, differences, and personal space.

• Communication: Talking honestly, listening carefully, and working through problems together.

• Trust: Believing that people are honest and reliable—and showing them you are too.

When these parts are strong, relationships feel safe, supportive, and positive.

Positive Social Behaviors

Good habits help relationships grow stronger, like:

• Communicating clearly: Saying what you mean without blaming. For example, if a friend upsets you, calmly explaining how you feel can fix problems.

• Active listening: Looking at the person, nodding, and paying attention shows you care about what they’re saying.

• Setting boundaries: Letting others know what feels okay or not okay helps build respect.

• Respectful conflict: Disagreements can be okay when handled calmly—they help you understand each other better.

Negative Social Behaviors (and How to Handle Them)

Sometimes, people act in ways that hurt others or make relationships hard, such as:

• Bullying: Teasing, leaving people out, or saying hurtful things.

• Stereotyping: Making unfair guesses about someone because of how they look or where they come from.

• Poor communication: Yelling, ignoring, or refusing to talk.

• Disrespect: Interrupting, mocking, or ignoring someone’s limits.

If this happens to you or others, try these steps:

• Speak clearly: Use “I” statements like, “I feel upset when…” to explain yourself without blaming.

• Ask questions: Sometimes people just misunderstand each other. Asking can help fix that.

• Stay calm: Take deep breaths or walk away if you’re too upset to respond nicely.

• Ask for help: If bullying or disrespect keeps happening, talk to a teacher, counselor, or trusted adult.

Your Relationship With Yourself

Having a good relationship with yourself is just as important. This means:

• Being kind to yourself and avoiding harsh self-criticism.

• Noticing your strengths and celebrating your successes, big or small.

• Taking care of yourself by relaxing, eating well, and getting enough sleep.

When you feel good inside, it’s easier to build positive connections with others.

Time to Reflect:

• How do I show respect to my friends or family?

• When someone disagrees with me, do I listen or get defensive?

• What’s one thing I can do this week to communicate better or set healthy limits?

The Bottom Line

Building healthy relationships starts with everyday choices—listening, respecting boundaries, and handling conflicts calmly. By practicing these skills, you’ll strengthen your friendships and family ties, and most importantly, develop a positive relationship with yourself.